Sunday, September 22, 2013

Complicated

God has evacuated me 
The emptiness is profound 
He has truly abandoned me 
I feel no heavenly cloak 
Because I left my culture I guess god is punishing me for good 
Ill never hear him
He will never come to me in a dream 
It's he who makes you question everything. 
It's in gods plan his decision 
Life long punishments 
I controlled enough and now he is just watching me suffer 
Linger in misery 
 I'm in misery 
Yet I can't end my breathe 
I have beings to raise 
I'm in misery
Ill never know what really happiness is about 
He is punishing me for being here breathing air 
I didn't ask to be here 
There's no cure
Except the cease of life. 
God isn't there in death 
He no longer calls the shots in death 
No need to get on your hands and knees and pray 
I can't wait to not be held to god stringent guidelines. 
In death we only have death 
You can't hurt people 
You can't hurt your self 
You don't have goals and expectations 
You don't fall in love in death 
You don't need to have sex
You don't need to orgasm 
You just cease to be 
Your light turns out 
Bulbs burn out always 
So if I leave this life I can't hurt the god that am suppose to devote my every waking moment for. 
You can't disappoint a jealous god if you aren't alive to disappoint 
How to live this world is the next process.
Pills, drugs. Inflicted pain cuts and others things aren't working.
God has evacuated me....
What would you do ... I'd rather burn out then be smothered .....

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