Myalgia

Did I make good choices today...
Why have I given up...
I hurt myself.
 I did.
I can't lie about my emotions
It reads all over my face
My outward view is so committed to telling everyone my feelings and my fears.
 I've lost out--
I'm utterly feeling a worthlessness inside.
 I had the antidote and I throw him away.
 I feel like I did this for him but I did it for me too.
 I am hurting this time .
All the booze and drugs in the world can dull the pain.
All I want is to not have you feel this pain.